I can't do this shit anymore... I pushed myself to blacking out I had a panic attack so bad. I feel terrible. Everything is just on me right now and I'm pushed over the edge... I feel depressed as well. I'm sorry if I'm irritating you with it... I'm trying to shove it all back, even though I know I shouldn't... I just need to get all this shit to go away. I feel so like... hopeless right now.
I just feel like I'm falling apart, completely. Just breaking into little pieces, falling into rock bottom. I just want it to stop... my grandpa was calling me all kinds of names earlier... it's like he knows I've tipped into depression and now I'm free game. I don't know.
I feel like just freaking out and thrashing things and letting my anger out... crying... punching.. I don't care. Just need to get it out my system. I'm sorry for scaring you earlier... also seemed like I was annoying a bit earlier as well. I don't know. My mind was a million different places... I'm sorry. /:
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